A new step on the Long Road

It’s been almost 18 months since this blog has seen anything new. In that time, I’ve thought several times about how to move forward with it, buying the domain name, how I can increase traffic, what I could post to get new content twice weekly, how to narrow my focus so there is some cohesiveness to all of this, how to manage social media, how to make the blog easier for me to manage, etc. I was thinking consumeristically. How can I make The Long Road to Zion an asset that generates an income? Ahhh, that very statement reveals in itself how I have lost my way.

Do I have something to say? Maybe. I’m kind of a scattered dude. Stuck in my own head and tangled when I open my mouth. I do like writing, though, and this gives me the opportunity for that. There are things I wonder about, and maybe if I’m wondering about them out loud, someone else is wondering about them, too? Things strike me as interesting.

One of those things has been social media, specifically Facebook. A few months ago, I left because I was so distracted by it. Then I grew proud that *I* wasn’t using it, so am I nullifying any benefit being away had? I’d also increased my isolation. As I reactivated my account again for the who knows how many-eth time and began to post, I noticed circles of friends.

It’s interesting, but somehow frustratingly compartmentalizing (and maybe even self-focused?), how I can kind of guess who may like what. Family posts get their set of likes, outdoor posts get their set of likes, geeky game and comic posts get their set of likes, theological posts get their set of likes, and so on. I’d love to see those circles blending into each other. This could be where the self-focus comes in but, all of those topics are from the same person. I don’t want to show one side to one group and another side to another group. It’s all me.

A few years ago, I was given the advice to write about what I love. Sometimes I’ve written propaganda on here. Go ahead and look back through the posts, you’ll figure it out. The last few I wrote on Seek the Kingdom turned to curiosity and wondering. I don’t want to try to get you to do something. I don’t have it all figured out. Some things I do believe make sense as they’ve remained solid in the midst of my shakiness. What I want to say if you’ve felt that manipulative propaganda from this blog or me in person, I’m sorry. You are a person, made in the image of God, and deserve better than a blog post to try to move you from one point to another.

What does all of this have to do with this blog? Where I want to go with The Long Road to Zion, going forward.

1. Relationships. This is what the circles taught me. If you’re reading this, it’s because you’re in my family, my church, my work, my hobbies, or the places I frequent. I doubt that this blog will reach past those narrow lanes of local traffic, however, it’s in those lanes that my life is in. If that’s you, I want to make The Long Road to Zion a place of hospitality that invites you in. Not in to agree on all things, but in to relate. Maybe our circles can start overlapping some more for the sake of the community we find ourselves in. Maybe this can be a tool that helps us love and understand and empathize with each other better. That would be awesome if that fruit came from this.

2. Space to figure stuff out. As I alluded to earlier, articulation is not my strength when I’m talking to you face to face. It seems like one thing I do is to set up straw men and end up trying to figure out things that aren’t really what’s bothering me in the first place. I don’t even have myself figured out, let alone those people close and closer to me. Binary thinking is a topic of conversation these days, and already being prone to an all-or-nothing way of thinking myself, I want to push back on that. I want to see if I can look at things and see them in a different way. Not an untrue way, but from an angle I haven’t seen them before. With every circle comes its own culture that can give us tunnel vision. In the Bible, Jesus sums up the greatest commandments as, “Love God, love your neighbor.” How can I do either of those if my eyes are only focused inward to what I know and am comfortable with?

3. A move to WordPress. Perhaps the most boring of all. As Google removed mobile support for Blogger, I found their desktop site on mobile to be difficult to manage. I don’t like loading up my laptop for much more than loading up my iPod. Trying to save all my “great” content from old site to this new site has not been functionally the smoothest. As I’m caring less about what I can preserve or how I can streamline it to a cash flow, but still need to technical support of an app so I can have my blogging preferences met, I’ve set up a redirect from the blogspot address to this WordPress address

I hope as I use The Long Road to Zion to capture some of the progress of a pilgrim, that you will continue to walk with me, and that God will crack open some of what’s eternal and bring it into what is present and common.

—-

A few words of thanks to those who in my circles have inspired me to be creative. Jenny, my wife, your faithfulness to love me at my worst is the clearest reflection of the Gospel I have. In addition, one way you love me is by always supporting the ideas I have, even if I never get them off the ground. You are an encourager. Jason and Justin from work, you guys have encouraged me to write. Matt, Ryan, Stan, Nathan, Paul, and Steve from church, y’all have walked the long road with me as I’ve walked and stumbled and fallen. Jack at The Cardboard Herald, you’ve celebrated creativity and inspired me to feed that. The staff at Borderlands Comics & Games, y’all have shown me how to not be so stuffy as an adult, but helped rekindle my love of art and story.

Seek the Kingdom: Sorrow and Sighing Will Flee

“And the redeemed of the Lord will return

and come to Zion with singing,

crowned with unending joy.

Joy and gladness will overtake them,

and sorrow and sighing will flee.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭51:11‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

I feel that regardless of one’s worldview, suffering and pain, sighing and sorrow, are present. As for me, I find identity not as someone who has earned any right to God’s favor, but as an undeserving object of mercy who had no claim to any kind of redemption. Yet, here I stand, many times weak and wavering, but with hope in the Lord who is never wavering. His Kingdom is coming. In the book Pilgrims Progress, author John Bunyon refers to the Kingdom of God as the Celestial City. Our sorrow and sighing will not outlast our Savior and the City he is bringing us to. The pains we go through are real, but because of Jesus, they will not last forever. Rest WILL come!

If I have not to look forward to Zion, the Kingdom of God, where Yahweh, his bride – the redeemed church, and his creation all intersect, where sorrow and sighing are only memories that increase the joys we will have, what good is my hope? My hope is that in Christ, the dwelling place of God is with man. God will bring his kingdom. We will have the Lord, and with the Lord, we will have all that is good. Zion without God is no Zion at all.

“The Lord is my shepherd; there is nothing I lack.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭23:1‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

In the classic book Precious Against Satan’s Devices, Thomas Brooks explains on of the devices that Satan uses to keep the saints in a sad condition. Surely our sighing and sorrow adds to that. In losing the comforts we have had in the joy of our salvation and redemption, it is a gentle slope to feeling hopeless and discouraged. To forget who we are is in need of a remedy. We must not lose sight of our hope! One of the remedies that Brooks gives the reader echoes Isaiah 51:11.

The fifth remedy against this device of Satan is, to consider, That God will restore and make up the comforts of his people. Though your candle be put out, yet God will light it again, and make it burn more bright than ever. Though your sun for the present be clouded, yet he who rides upon the clouds shall scatter those clouds, and cause the sun to shine and warm your heart as in former days, as the psalmist speaks: ‘You who have showed me great and sore troubles, shall quicken me again, and shall bring me up again from the depths of the earth. You shall increase my greatness, and comfort me on every side’ (Psalm 71:20, 21).

God takes away a little comfort, that he may make room in the soul for a greater degree of comfort. This the prophet Isaiah sweetly shows: ‘I have seen his ways, and will heal him; I will lead him also, and restore comforts unto him, and to his mourners’ (Isa. 57:18). Bear up sweetly, O precious soul! your storm shall end in a calm, and your dark night in a sunshine day! Your mourning shall be turned into rejoicing, and the waters of consolation shall be sweeter and higher in your soul than ever! The mercy is surely yours—but the time of giving it is the Lord’s. Wait but a little, and you shall find the Lord comforting you on every side. See Psalm 126:6, and 42:7, 8. 

May we all find our rest in remembering that we are redeemed in Christ, and he will bring about his kingdom that will know no end. Sorrow and sighing will flee. Our joy and happiness and singing and gladness will know know end, because Jesus will know no end.

Book Review – If You Can Keep It: The Forgotten Promise of American Liberty by Eric Metaxas

After the construction of the Constitution, a woman asked Benjamin Franklin, “Do we have a monarchy or a republic?” Franklin replies, “A republic, if you can keep it.” Echoing the words of Benjamin Franklin, Eric Metaxas is helping the reader to remember that we cannot simply take America, or the promise of America, for granted. Yet, many Americans have fallen asleep to what that even means. While reading If You Can Keep It, I went through a wide range of thoughts. I nearly felt fickle as I tried to decide what I thought of If You Can Keep It as I read it, but couldn’t make up my mind. For this review of the book, I want to try and sort out some of those thoughts. I’ll begin with sharing one of my favorite quotes from the book, then go from there.

“If one’s thoughts were regulated by the power of the state, 

how could one really be free?” 

~ Eric Metaxas

America. Based on your story, on the narrative that has been part of your life, just to say American is bound to bring up all different kinds of thoughts and feelings. Am I proud of my country? Disgusted with my government? In an election year where nobody seems happy with our choices, considering what The Forgotten Promise of American Liberty is seems very timely.

One of the major themes of the book is American exceptionalism. Admittedly, I am working through my own thoughts on this. In America we have freedom, democracy, liberty… well, at least some of us do. Can America really be exceptional with all of the blood on her hands? Let’s face it. There have been a lot of atrocities that have occurred on American soil and by Americans. Metaxas says to focus only on America’s successes while ignoring her faults is as much as a fallacy to avoid as to only focus on her faults without acknowledging her successes. He handles this gently while never dismissing any one persons or groups plights and sufferings.

There are so many issues today, it can feel like there is no point in trying to be an influence. I believe the approach Eric Metaxas takes in If You Can Keep It is a macroview assessment of America. We must balance all of our experiences, the truth of America’s history, against not who the USA is on the world stage, but the PROMISE of America. The promise that the Statue of Liberty reminds us of.

“Give me your tired, your poor, 

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, 

The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. 

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, 

I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

The Statue of Liberty-Ellis Island Foundation, Inc.

When I read those words, I love them. But can I say this is my American experience? Even as I’m here because my great ancestors saw those words for themselves and came to America’s shores in search of liberty, it is not my experience that many people carry that sentiment. I haven’t. I think that is Eric Metaxas’s point: we have forgotten who we are. We have forgotten the promise of America. When we forget and cease to live by these virtuous truths, when we cease to live for others and live for ourselves instead, we cease to be America. We will implode. Metaxas is encouraging us to remember who we are, a nation who exists – in promise – to bring liberty to our neighbors.

The urgency of If You Can Keep It is to love our country. That may seem difficult with a look at the headlines of today or the past. The praiseworthy should be praised, and the hideousness should be acknowledged and repented from. We must not forget. If we the people of America further forget who we are intended to be, we will cease to be the fullness of who we were meant to be and become a shell. America in name only.

How can we remember? What did our founding fathers want? They were escaping from the tyranny of oppression coming from Britain. They wanted to be their own people group with their own freedoms to govern themselves. Despite their many faults, this should strike a chord with many of us. We desire the freedom and promise of America. Too good to be true, you say? We are not there, but we must remember and believe in THAT America.

Personally, as a Christian, there is some tension for me while reading the book. I see that I am in exile in this world, and where I’m at in this world is America. My true kingdom is God’s country, and He will bring it about. At the same time, I need to acknowledge that what freedoms I have here are God given and a foretaste of that great country that awaits for me. America may or may not become a shell of the true American promise, but whatever happens, America will always be a shell of God’s eternal city. I don’t know what role America will play in the timeline of history. I don’t believe that America is a continuation of God’s people of Israel in the Bible, though I would be curious to know what position Eric Metaxas holds on that thought. Regardless, the best of what is America should make us long for heaven, and allow us to enjoy God through the gift that He has made America is to its people. With eternity in mind, as a Christian, we should seek to bring as much of the future into the present as we can. We should fight to taste those eternal shores of the justice and truth of God’s country while we are still waiting for it. Eric Metaxas did not go this direction in the book, but it is the direction and extent that I would take with what he wrote.

Perhaps you have heard the phrase of being too heavenly minded to be of any earthly good. I propose that if you are of no earthly good, you are not heavenly minded enough. It is with one eye on heaven that we should proclaim “all men are created equal!” and seek to bring the future into the now, even though we know full reality of reconciliation between God and man, and man and man, will not occur until heaven.

One of the main threads Eric weaves through If You Can Keep It is the Golden Triangle, inspired by Os Guinness. The three points of this are freedom, virtue, and faith, all of which are dependent on one another for a truly free society. I found it interesting how even Benjamin Franklin was a part of this, as he did not seem to have a faith of his own. The section on leaders and virtue was excellent.

Some of the other discussions I thoroughly enjoyed were on Nathan Hale, statues in Central Park, and the veneration of heroes. The exposition of The Midnight ride of Paul Revere made me realize just how much I had forgotten the promise of American liberty. Later in the book, the section on Abraham Lincoln and his leadership on the brink of the Civil War was truly inspiring, especially on how America will either live forever or die by suicide. The Lincoln quotes that Metaxas gives us are a wealth of wisdom. Even on a microlevel, I was convicted and encouraged at the same time with how can I specifically love my brothers and sisters here.

As the book was coming to a close, I found myself thinking, “This is all great and inspiring information, but what am I supposed to do with it?” What Eric Metaxas proposes we do with the information he gives us in If You Can Keep It is surprisingly simple, but profound and impactful. How can we love our country, love the liberty we have, and exist to use our freedoms for the benefits of others? It will go beyond how we act in the public square, but will get right down to how we will inspire and govern ourselves as individuals.

For me, I found myself asking the question, “How now shall I live?” The answer, which I believe is a natural extension of If You Can Keep It, was found in the book of Micah in the Bible.

He has told you, O man, what is good;

and what does the LORD require of you

but to do justice, and to love kindness,

and to walk humbly with your God?

Micah 6:8 ESV

You can read more about If You Can Keep It: The Forgotten Promise of American Liberty at http://ericmetaxas.com/books/if-you-can-keep-it/

*Disclosure: I was accepted to be part of the Launch Team for If You Can Keep It by the publisher. I was asked to give my honest thoughts, but in no way did this require a positive review for the book.

Seek the Kingdom: Remember Your Name

  
This week, I had a revelation.

I had forgotten my name. 

You may or my not be able to identify with this, but for me personally as a Christian, I struggle with sin. I have the knowledge that God became a man (Jesus) to live and die and be raised so that we can be reconciled to each other. What could be better than being reconciled with God? It turns out, actually believing that.

For the last several years, and if you trace through the history of this blog you will see streaks of it, I have struggled with depression. No, I’m not going to call depression a sin. Stay with me. I have been strongly reluctant to seek medical help for it because I do not believe for one second that I personally have a chemical imbalance or anything physiological like that. As I analyze the events that started me to spiral downward into despair, anxiety, fretting, and fear, I can typically pinpoint where it started. Whether or not I want to own up to the ugly truth at the time is one thing, but as I dig deep down into myself, I often find that the desire for approval of others or myself is near the heart of the matter. Then I begin working to gain that elusive perceived approval, see it further slipping from my fingers, and begin the downward descent into darkness. I’m working to be made righteous in the eyes of myself and the eyes of people around me. This is where I have forgotten the gospel, which I need to be daily reminded of.

“But to the one who does not work, but believes on Him who declares the ungodly to be righteous, his faith is credited for righteousness.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭4:5‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

http://bible.com/72/rom.4.5.hcsb

This is the good news that I have head knowledge of, but even more often as I forget it in my head, I fail to believe in my heart. I have been declared righteous by God the Father because I believe that God the Son (Jesus) is my righteousness and therefore stands as my mediator, BUT I seem to always get stuck in a repeating cycle of turn away from God, turn to God, draw near other things, draw near to God, work for fleeting rest, rest in God, try to fill broken cisterns, be filled by fountain of God, ad nausea. 

Which brings me to my revelation.

I have been finding my identity in depression. “Depressed” has become who I am. Mark Driscoll once said, “When you know who you are, you know what to do.” What you do and how you respond to life and God and others flows out of who you think you are. It flows out of your identity. How am I going to respond when others fail to approve me in the way I would desire, even crave, them to? Act out of my identity – be crushed. I forget that I already have God’s approval, not because I’ve worked hard enough or been good enough to earn it, but because He has chosen to love me. In Christ, he has taken away my old crumbling identities and given me his. 

I had forgotten my name: His. I am in Christ. I am His.

“Therefore, no condemnation now exists for those in Christ Jesus, because the Spirit’s law of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:1-2‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

http://bible.com/72/rom.8.1-2.hcsb

The rest found in God is unbelievably quieting to my restless heart. The love of God sets us free.

What about you? What do you run to for your rest? If we run to anything besides God, we make that thing out to be God (an idol), and then it crumbles beneath the weight of it trying to be God, and we never find rest. We are never satisfied. We are stuck in the cycle of trying to find rest in a god that is not real in place of the only God who is. The only God who brings true rest. Depression is an indicative response that I am running to other gods, like approval, for my rest. I often find that my identity is found in wherever I run to for rest, or my response when I don’t find rest in whatever I have run to.

If we are going to seek the Kingdom of God, we must find our rest in its King. We will only be able to find rest in him if we believe our record no longer bears the name of our failings or successes, but bears Jesus name.  If you are a Christian, you have been made new. If you are not a Christian, seek the King and the rest he brings, and you will find it.

Christian, you are free. 

Non-Christian, you can be free. 

Do not forget your name.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away, and look, new things have come.”

‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭5:17‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

http://bible.com/72/2co.5.17.hcsb

Seek the Kingdom: What Does That Even Mean?

  Right out of the gate, I’m one who is trying to figure this out.

As a Christian, I know I’m supposed to do something. I know I’m supposed to be like Jesus, but I can’t be as holy as Jesus, which is why I need Jesus. In the New Testament, Jesus talks about the kingdom of God a lot. He tells us that it is at hand, it is not what or where we think it should be, and it is worth pursuing with reckless  abandon. 

“Being asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come, he answered them, “The kingdom of God is not coming in ways that can be observed, nor will they say, ‘Look, here it is!’ or ‘There!’ for behold, the kingdom of God is in the midst of you.”” ‭‭Luke‬ ‭17:20-21‬ ‭ESV‬‬

There are plenty of other Kingdom of God verses from Scripture I could post here, but one other specifically points to what I believe it is talking about.

“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure, buried in a field, that a man found and reburied. Then in his joy he goes and sells everything he has and buys that field.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭13:44‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

I believe that the following verse is the corner that you trip over of that treasure buried in the field. Explorers, philosophers, scientists, artists, men of faith and men of none have uncovered all kinds of amazing truths that change our minds, the way we live, and are worth looking at. Above those, I believe this is one of the greatest discoveries that has ever been laid hold of because of the treasure it unearths:

“Be appalled at this, you heavens, and shudder with great horror,” declares the Lord. “My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water.” Jeremiah‬ ‭2:12-13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Why is this a treasure? It sounds intense. The verse starts out letting us know this is serious, then we start reading about sin and forsaking, springs and waters, work, and cisterns (water containers). 

Sin is a heated word with much debate around it, so in effort to bring clarity to this post, I will be taking from Augustine of Hippo and Martin Luther to define sin as the self curving in on the self. Think of sin as being like the ultimate ingrown toenail of heart, behavior, and life. 

Let’s move to water. What can we know about it in a way that effects what we believe, who we are and what we do? Water is for life. Water is for the thirsty. A large percentage of our bodies are water, so we die without it. Thousands die for lack of clean water. Wells, towers, reservoirs, and other cisterns created to hold supplies of water for the thirsty and dirty.  We also continually need it. Our tongues grow fat and dry without it. Our health declines without it. It meets and immediate need, but the thirst comes back. Water as we know it can not satisfy us. What of this living water, though? What is the difference between it and water that we know of? In the middle of an interaction next to a well between Jesus and a woman, who by cultural aspects he never should have been talking to, Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (‭‭John‬ ‭4:13-14‬ ‭ESV‬‬ http://bible.com/59/jhn.4.13-14.esv)

This is what the people have forsaken. Set before them is a spring, a fountain, a waterfall of living water that slakes the thirst of any man for all time. The notion of thirst is gone, for all who come to the fountain are satisfied. What did they do instead? Dig holes. They turned to the work of their hands. The spring of all satisfaction is bubbling up in sweet life giving fulfillment, and the spring is ignored by people who say they can find satisfaction in places and things where it can never be found. “We will find our own basins that will be a spring of life to us!” Sure, they have found pleasure and enjoyment and accomplishment and a temporary satisfaction, but like water we hold behind dams, it leaks out. It dries up. The thirst comes back, and the people need more and more water to quench the thirst that always returns.

We do not know that in our collecting and chasing and obsessing that this spring of living water is in a field we think to be worthless. We – and I include myself in this – think that the cisterns of possessions, fame, reputation, skill, ability, love, sex, freedom, government, money, comfort, retirement, career, entertainment, religion, identity, relationships, safety, and a host of other things (which may even be good things!) will satisfy the thirst that keeps coming back. When we go to drink from those supplies and become threatened as they are depleted or stolen from, what do we do? How do you respond? Do our actions curve inward on us, the very things we think will save and secure and satisfy us actually ending up destroying us? Do we seek some other cistern? Or…there is a fountain in a nearly forgotten field that is worth more than all the trash we stockpile and run to in its place. I am reminded of a Jim Elliot quote which says, “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.” A satisfaction that will leave a man or woman never thirsting again. 

We glanced right over who or what is that spring of living water. Let’s return to our verse one more time.

“Be appalled at this, you heavens, and shudder with great horror,” declares the Lord. “My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water.” Jeremiah‬ ‭2:12-13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Declares the Lord, “They have forsaken me, the fountain of living water…” Me. The Lord is our fountain of living water which forever satisfies. This is the treasure in the field. To seek the kingdom, I believe, is to start here. What does it even mean to be satisfied by God? This, friend, is what I believe to be a razor edge narrow Way to follow that will forever satisfy the deepest recesses of our hearts. 

Lord, persevere us on this Way to finding you as our treasure, our spring of living water. Give us you.

“I have asked one thing from the Lord; it is what I desire: to dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, gazing on the beauty of the Lord and seeking Him in His temple.”‭‭ Psalms‬ ‭27:4‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

Free Range Despondency

The black dog. Depression. Despair. Melancholy. Despondency. Down. Moodiness. 

Does any of that ring familiar to you? Do you, like me, allow some of your thoughts to run free and unchecked? Does the narrative in your head tell you to give up, that it is hopeless? The mind can really be a tangled mess of thoughts, experiences, assumptions and behaviors. I’ve struggled with this kind of thing for several years, so before going to the medical community to address anything chemically off in my body, I sought pastoral counseling to see what the Gospel had to say.

It turns out a lot.

The details of what led me to this point aren’t relevant for this blog, but some of the counsel I received is. The Bible was written for more than just me individually. My pastor walked me through Romans 5, 6, 7 and 8. I’m not able to articulate this as skillfully as he did, but after capturing my reflections and applications of those chapters in Romans in my journal, I felt part of that reflection would be valuable to share here. If you are reading this and feel lost, I suggest reading those four chapters just mentioned to help fill out some of the gaps you may feel in my thoughts, as I am responding to those chapters.

I am either dead under the law or alive in Christ. To the law, I am weak to fulfill it. I am weak to even do the good things I desire to do. The law is good. I agree with it, yet can’t fulfill it. 

Ah! There is Christ!

My condemnation under the law has been poured on Christ, and none is left for me. I am now alive. Yet I am still weak, and look for identity in strength. Poor me, wretched me, hopeless me… FULL of weakness. It is in this gap that I find Christ to be strong. I am so weak that many times I cannot even find words to pray, but the Spirit intercedes on my behalf to the Father, as I am whole in Christ. I am God’s adopted son, even as I am weak. 

God works all things together for my good. All things includes my weakness, struggle, failure, depression, apathy, pride, arrogance, anger, vain pursuits and thoughts. The Father is mine, and in/by the Spirit, I am being transformed more into Christlikeness day by day. Consider who you were 10-15 years ago? I am being made new, more like Christ, but so slowly I can scarcely perceive it. Many times I feel the weakness so fully and tell myself that hope is lost. I become my own judge and forget Christ.

(This next bold/bracketed section is the breaking down of Romans 8:34)

Who is the one who condemns? 

(I do!!)

Jesus Christ is the one who died,

(when it should have been me!!)

but even more, has been raised,

(proving His standing in my place and taking all of my condemnation was efficient to reconcile me to the Father!!)

He is also at the right hand of God

(not condemned Himself, sin has been defeated, death is no more, and Jesus reigns in life!!)

and intercedes for us.

(He is my mediator between God and I, and if Jesus is my advocate when He is the only one to condemn, condemnation left me as Christ left the grave clothes in an empty tomb!!)

and now I say… I AM FREE! I AM FREE!

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28 ESV)

5 Reasons Why I Still Believe In My Church

The church can be a struggle. I’ve had my fair share of struggles at the church My family and I have been attending for 10+ years; however, those are typically centered around my preferences and misunderstandings. No church is perfect. That’s not an excuse, but a reality. 

Charles Spurgeon once said, “Give yourself to the Church. You that are members of the Church have not found it perfect and I hope that you feel almost glad that you have not. If I had never joined a Church till I had found one that was perfect, I would never have joined one at all! And the moment I did join it, if I had found one, I should have spoiled it, for it would not have been a perfect Church after I had become a member of it. Still, imperfect as it is, it is the dearest place on earth to us…”

It seems that there will never be a shortage of complaints to have about something or someone. Are you the same as me, that once I start complaining, I get tunnel vision for everything that’s wrong about anything? “Be positive!” sounds trite and Pollyana-esque, but there is a hint of truth to that. As Christians, even though our sins have been paid for in Christ, much sin is still present in our lives. Sometimes we have to search with squinted eyes to see where God is at work in each other. At face value, I’m a giant mess. At face value, the church can look like a giant mess. In the midst of the mess, God is weaving something beautiful. 

So as I’ve been contemplating about my church, I came up with 5 reasons why I’m still there. Every member does not succeed or fail at each of these every time across every year, but the mere presence of some things and absence of others is reason to believe God is at work.

1. The church doesn’t try to impress me.

From the first day we showed up until now, I have never felt like I was going to a show. It has never been flashy or over the top. There has never been a music minister leading a concert and soaking up the praise like we were all there to see him. Whether it’s the singing, instruments, preaching, kids ministry, whatever… I have never felt that the church was trying to be anything other than it was – beggar’s who have found bread trying to tell other beggars where we found bread. We get to hear the good news of Jesus Christ’s birth, life, death, and resurrection in our songs and sermons and lives. 

2. The church has allowed me to struggle.

Sometimes I have merely been moody, and other times I’ve gone on the proverbial warpath. I have shown up to small group meetings and made them miserable. I’ve made people to feel bad on purpose. I’ve let friends struggle and refused to help them. I’m a mess even below face value. A ragamuffin, really. I’ve been depressed, confused, demanding, accusatory, and unhealthily speculative. In the middle of my mess, I’ve been allowed to struggle and question and wonder what the heck was going on. While there have been instances of guys trying to fix me (I hate that, and I do that!), I have been given room to not have it all figured out.

3. The church has forced me to think, reason, and adapt to situations and people I’m uncomfortable with.

If you consider what the gospel is and how it crosses all boundaries of class, race, status, and more, there is a lot of diversity within the church. Men and women come from all different backgrounds bringing with them all different kinds of ideas. That is an unavoidable opportunity for friction. We all come from different backgrounds and upbringings. From there, we all bring our own unique baggage, burdens, and brilliance. Everyone in the church is united in Christ, but sometimes Christ is the only thing that unites us. This is something that has had a profound effect on me. Through the church, God is growing and changing and loving his people VIA his people. That is a mind load to think about.

4. The church has allowed me to mourn.

My family has seen broken bodies and crooked minds. From miscarriages to chronic health conditions, we have felt the force of our fallen humanity. We have felt our bodies betray us. A lot of time, there is nothing that can be done. It can’t be fixed or made better or put back together. It just sucks, and that’s it. We have had instances of others just mourning with us. People who will be sad for you and with you is a great mercy. 

5. The church is dynamic, not stagnant.

Decisions have to be made. Directions have to be taken. Some of those have been good, and others not so much. There has seemed to me the ever present question of how can we grow together and with God better? How can we do our ministry better? What changes can we make? Where do we need to adapt, make corrections, reinforce what is working, and do things with more transparency? We may miss the mark, but I am encouraged that the church is not ceasing to aim.

Like it not, we need each other. We are frail and fragile and failing and frustrated. We need to remind each other of the central backbone that carries each of these reasons why I still believe in going to my church: The Lord is at hand. He is on the move. He is at work. One day, we will see the beautiful tapestry he is weaving of this mess of people. One day, we will sit at the his table and eat and drink and tell the old tales of waiting for his kingdom. Be encouraged. Love your church, even if you aren’t loving it well. We will spend eternity together. We must remind each other that there is hope in our hurting. The dawn is coming. The Lord is at hand.

“What is the story of my priesthood? It is the story of an unfaithful person through whom God continues to work!” ~ Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

(While I did not write this as an advertisement for my church but as an encouragement to really seek and contemplate and consider where the Lord is at hand in your own church… you can read more about where we attend by visiting http://www.rgcsc.org.)

Face to Face

Some things have been rattling around in my mind over the last few weeks. I’m just trying to figure some of this life and myself out. You could look at this as a sneak peak into the internal thought process of analysis and decision making.

I need the Lord. Desperately. Subtly, I feel I’ve gone in a “just me and Jesus” direction. I may be on the verge of coming out of that, but it remains to be seen at this point. One of the ways the Lord makes himself known is through his Bride, the Church. The Holy Spirit ministers to his Bride through his Bride. Through fellowship. Relationships with other believers is more important and life-giving that I’ve given a credit for this year. I feel it’s easy to say bitterness has rot my posture toward the church.

Face-to-face time. This has been front and center at my attention over the past couple weeks. Not that I focus on it, really, but that it keeps popping up in conversations, podcasts, blog posts, sermons, etc. Relationships cannot grow, they cannot thrive without face-to-face time. This can be derailed in lots of ways. How much face to screen time takes away from face-to-face time? How many conversations that could knit two people closer together are lost for the sake of eavesdropping into someone else’s online drama or someone else’s white washed social media? Or just shopping and consuming? I don’t want to come to a place where I reject technology, but rather I want to start asking the question, “How can I harness this technology to where it enhances face-to-face time instead of creating a void in the relationship?” This will likely be a balance I will never achieve, but I must never cease to aim for it.

Time. I’m a finite creature. My capacity is only so high before things I engage in begin to suffer and I make halfhearted investments in others. Time is a limited resource, and one I will never get back. When it’s wasted, I feel the seeds of bitterness beginning to root.

When I say yes to something, I say no to something. This is where God, the church, relationships, face-to-face time, and stewardship all come together. What will I say yes to? Bitterness? Laziness? Anger? Prayer? Relationships? The Lord? My wife? My children? If I say yes to staring at my phone or some other screen beyond appropriateness, I say no to play and story time with the kids, board games, deep conversations, honest and open and lighthearted and laugh-filled and scary and fearful conversations? Just some examples. I have several behaviors that I need to change.

Who will I invest in? Who will have access to me? I realize that may sound cold, but I have to be realistic about my capacity.

My wife and kids will have the greatest access to me. This is going to mean they do not get crowded out by others, who will have lesser degrees of access. This has to start at home and branch out from there. Texting, email, social media, etc. Those screen time conversations that can enhance face-to-face time need to take a backseat to my own family. However this has to be the expectation set with the relationships I’m in.

I need the Lord. 

“Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.”

Psalm 127:1 ESV

My wife. 
My children. 
My fellowship of believers. 
My family.
Everyone else.

Fellowship of believers. Those relationships in the church by whom the Holy Spirit minister’s and the father reveals himself. Few are long-term friends, and there are several who are in what I’ve been calling an “ember” stage of friendship. I feel what it looks like, as far as setting expectations, is to tell those closest and ember and beyond relationships my struggle to spend time with the Lord and face-to-face. To explain to them the enhance/void dynamic of technology, and that means I may be spotty in response to them because I’m trying to invest in my family. They will have higher access that most, but not above my wife and the kids. I must be pursuing the Lord above all. I guess this blog post will serve that purpose to those who will slog through it to this point. There may be times my excess ability is extremely limited because my phone may not even be with me. It may be *gasp* in another room of the house or in a drawer somewhere.

Rest is not something I can say I’ve had much of lately, physically or mentally or spiritually. As crazy as it sounds, it sometimes seems like the Lord calls me in the night. “Seek me. I am your rest.”

“I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”
John 15:5 ESV

A New Approach For December

Two things started out the 2015 Christmas season differently for me this year.

The first was that we started decorating for Christmas two weeks before Thanksgiving. Ah! The horrors and atrocities of our consumerist society… or maybe not. 

Typically, December and the whole Christmas season is frantic and stressful. Though the house looks great when my wife decorates it, there is so much craziness and running around that it feels like we have barely enjoyed them before it’s time to take the decorations down.

The second thing different this season is that I’m actually enjoying it. Christmas has not typically been a season in excited about. Putting up decorations and the Christmas tree in the living room were all a chore I would much rather avoid. This year, I wanted to be a part of it.

I believe that the second is a result of the first. To approach December with a perspective and direction of rest I believe is honoring the true spirit of Christmas. Christ came that we could cease our working and striving and trying so very impossibly hard to be good and finally rest in the truth that He has done that for us. 

Now in Christ, I can be free to enjoy Christmas and much more. 

The SC Project: Kid Friendly Waterfall Training at Wildcat Wayside

Recently, the kids and I had a couple hours to spend while mommy visited with a friend. We diverted from our normal destination of Paris Mountain to Highway 11 for some waterfall training. I say training because there is a level of danger when hiking around waterfalls. This year, several hikers have fallen to their deaths at waterfalls. I’m aware of at least two death that occurred at Upper Wildcat falls in years prior. Waterfall training is important because there is a natural draw to them, but there are also ways we can enjoy them recklessly that can turn fun into danger in half an instant. There are rules to stay safe while still marveling over God’s amazing creation with awe and wonder. You’re now free to exhale and read on.

This is a relatively easy (I recorded 212ft of elevation) loop hike just over 1 mile with 4 waterfalls. The smallest children may have some difficulty, but the trail is good and the area is beautiful.

We started at the parking area right below the Wildcat Wayside sign. From there, a short set of stone steps led us to Lower Wildcat Falls. Oftentimes in the summer, there are folks selling produce and boiled peanuts at the road while people enjoy wading in the plunge pool below the falls. 

To the left of the falls, the trail ascends to Middle Wildcat Falls immediately. This is probably my favorite section of this area. The plunge pool is more shallow than the one below, and is perfect for kiddies to splash around in. This is also where the training begins. A series of rocks serves as a broken bridge to cross the creek. The kids are not allowed to be in the pool downstream of those rocks, because the top of Lower Wildcat is just beyond them. We splashed around a bit in the sandy bottomed pool at Middle Wildcat. Closer to the falls where it gets rocky, there are a couple “deep” sections, like 18 inches maybe. My son stumbled into it and soaked himself, but fortunately it was a warm day for October. 

Lesson 1: Wet rocks are slick and slippery.

After the rock hop across the creek, there is an information and map kiosk about the park. The “Falls” notated on the map are for a low flow unnamed cascade along the loop trail. Also, there is the top of Middle Wildcat. Very firmly and clearly, it was time for me to give more training.

Lesson 2: We do NOT play at the top of waterfalls.

The trail levels out at the foundation and still standing chimney of an old cabin. Beyond that, the trail forks. You can go either direction, as the trail is a loop. Follow the yellow blazes painted on the rocks and trees. We took the right side path and started gaining elevation. This will undoubtedly be the most difficult portion of the hike for the youngest explorers, as it takes the energy to hike up the hill and they will need the encouragement that “We will go back to those waterfalls on the way out.” It is a beautiful hike along the edge of the valley. A turn and we were at the Falls, which I count as a waterfall but is not that impressive in all honesty. 

Much more is the upcoming Upper Wildcat Falls. Which brought us back into training time.

Lesson 3: People have died at waterfalls.

Waterfalls are unforgiving. Their beauty demands a healthy respect. Admittedly, sometimes the groups I hike with can blur the lines of what that looks like, but that doesn’t change the fact that dangerous areas demand caution. This day, Upper Wildcat was flowing low, but this 100′ waterfall still is an awe inspiring rock formation, and safe as long as you stay on the trail. My two older kids both said,”Whoa!!!” as the trees gave way to bare rock cliffs when hiking on the trail. The Danger signs are in 3 locations, so there’s plenty notice of the need for caution and tempered exploring. You’ll have to cross the creek with a small rock hop.

The trail meanders through the forest next to the creek at a much easier elevation during this section. There are some cool cascades in the valley as Wildcat Creek makes its way from the Upper to Middle to Lower Falls and eventually the Middle Saluda River. These are visible from the trail.

Soon, we were back at Lower Wildcat for some wading in the chilly plunge pool. The kids easily waded up to the falls close enough to touch it. 

This really is a great hike for families. Despite the dangers of waterfalls, if you stay on the trail, it is quite safe. There are lots of things to see, and it’s a wonderful way to get outside. What a jewel we have in the Upstate of South Carolina! With places like this, we can ease our kids (and ourselves!) into the outdoors. If you’re looking for something with a lot of payoff for little effort, Wildcat Wayside should be on your list. My kids loved it.